#i am in no way dunking on star

[edwardslostalchemy]

I'm thinking about Star and Stripe and Carmen, and I'm just like I REALLY embraced My Mexican Roots there with Carmen. Star is tall, blonde, and VERY muscular. Which, you know, okay cool. Gringa. Carmen is 5 feet of whoop ass, brown, and muscular, with her curly hair and big brown eyes. She doesn't have an OP quirk like New Order, but her Portals are very handy and she's clever with them. She's sneaky and can lie through her teeth for her job, which doesn't sound honest, but it's necessary for her to do so to protect her identity and not give information away. She doesn't believe in monologuing. Comes with the job. She also doesn't command fighter jets; she works with an agency that helps with search and rescue. But that opens doors to more contacts and resources. She also doesn't rely on her quirk 100% of the time and uses her physical strength to fight. I just love her so much. She's grown in my head since a year ago into this multi-layered character. She's so cool to me.

She's also the #2 hero of México. She doesn't need to be #1 to be chingona. 💪

[carolperkinsexgirlfriend]

can you see the stars in your dreams (and do they have a lot to say about me) - Part 8

Or: a secret Admirer AU

PART 1 || PART 2 || PART 3 || PART 4 || PART 5 || PART 6 || PART 7

“I can’t believe you let me fall asleep!” Chrissy complains, crowding into Steve’s space to desperately try to fix her hair in the mirror.

Steve snorts, unbelievably fond at the way her bangs are going every direction but down. “What am I, your mother?” he asks, fixing his own hair by standing on his tippy toes and looking over her head.

“No, but she will be killing me for this!” Chrissy cries, finally giving up on finger-combing her bangs to dunk the strands into the sink and get them wet. “Thanks for reminding me!”

“You’re bitchy in the morning,” he mutters, grimacing when she pulls her head out of the sink abruptly enough that water droplets fling from her head and onto his shirt. “Now, hurry up, we’re already late.”

She flips him off, ignoring him entirely to continue fixing her hair.

They’re both late; Chrissy doesn’t let him forget it for the rest of the day, as if it’s his fault.

“I remember when I thought you were nice,” Steve mutters, laughing helplessly when she elbows him in the side.

“You love it,” she says, smiling as they sit across from each other in their usual spot in the library, feet settling together beneath the table.

The thing is, he does. He’s always liked Chrissy, even back when she was all sunshine and rainbows, but even more so now that there’s some grit to her.

“Shut up.”

Chrissy beams, all sunshine again as she plunks her stack of books onto the table and shuffles her letter-drafting notebook to the top. Only once she’s opened to a blank page does she bite her lip, looking up at Steve through her lashes.

“Are you sure you want to keep doing this?” she asks, voice hesitant.

“What do you mean?”

She breaks eye contact, fiddling with her pen anxiously. “I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

Steve doesn’t tell her that he already is, that a part of him, the small, squirming part he keeps hidden in his heart, wishes he’d never done this. That watching Eddie kiss Chrissy’s hand and knowing without being told that she’s the kind of girl Eddie might want had broken something inside him. That Steve knows he could never be Eddie’s choice, and knowing that burns.

But, since the flirting started, Steve hasn’t written a word, and that’s worse, somehow. He only has the one tether to Eddie, and he wants to keep it, even if it’s through Chrissy’s handwriting, and Chrissy’s words, and Chrissy’s face.

He just wants.

Instead of saying all that, he reaches out, putting his hand gently on Chrissy’s hand and replies, “I’m sure,” even as the fluttering of his heart makes a liar of him.

Chrissy’s still biting her lip, not looking reassured at all. Steve’s gut churns with worry. ”Are you, though? You didn’t sign up for this, and if you don’t want to do it anymore, that’s okay.”

She smiles, her bottom lip blanched white from her teeth, as she replies, “We’re in this together, right?”

Even with the smile, she still looks worried, but Chissy puts her pen to paper and dutifully writes out the words Steve speaks, editing and revising each thought until it’s something someone might want to hear.

They keep their voices quiet because there are more people sitting in the library than usual today: a big group working on a project, a couple of freshman scowling down at what looks like a Geometry textbook, and closest of all, a girl he recognizes as a band nerd, flipping through a magazine too fast to really be reading it.

It doesn’t take them long—they’ve done this enough times that it’s become almost an art form. Chrissy pushes the completed letter across the table for his final review before it’s signed and sealed.

“It’s good,” Steve says, pushing the letter back across to her to be dropped off in Eddie’s locker.

His heart aches; Steve wants to slap himself.

Instead, he parts ways with Chrissy at their cars, Jeff already waiting beside hers to be driven home, and goes back to his house, bereft of the noise Chrissy had brought only that morning.

*** 

Eddie had worried when there wasn’t another letter after he’d started talking to Chrissy. Did she not like him anymore? Was she done writing them entirely now that she can talk to him face to face?

He worries incessantly for days about it, even as Chrissy keeps saying hi to him in the halls, keeps smiling back when they catch eyes across the cafeteria, keeps being her usual, friendly self.

It’s just, the letters are different. They’re more raw, somehow, more real. And, no matter how this thing goes with Chrissy, if they stop coming, he’ll miss them.

So, it’s a relief when he opens his locker the Monday after Chrissy’s eventful Hellfire induction to find a letter. He can’t wait to read it, the anticipation has built up over too many days of not receiving any. So, he rushes to the same, familiar bathroom and opens it in the stall he’s starting to think of as his.

       Eddie —

       How did your show go? I bet you’ve got a couple groupies already, you’ve already got the look for it. Did you figure out the riff for the song you were working on?

       I tried playing the piano again, and I’m a little rusty, but it’s like riding a bike, you know? (Do you know how to ride a bike?) It’s nice, playing music, even if it’s all songs someone else has written, and they’re still not coming out right.

       I’m sorry it’s been so long since my last letter. I just didn’t know what to say. You’re so patient, and nice, and I got caught up in my head you know? But I missed you.

       I slept with your letter beneath my pillow last night, hoping for dreams of you.

       Yours, Always

       Your Secret Admirer

       P.S. I haven’t read it, but maybe I will. Just to keep with the theme, put this letter in The Lord of the Rings.

He devours the words, slumping onto the toilet seat the longer he reads. It’s perfect—just what he was missing. He reads it once, twice, thrice, the same way he had when he’d received the first two, disbelieving that such lovely words were meant for him.

Eddie skips his second period, first already long gone by the time he’d trundled into the school’s parking lot, and pens a response, then and there.

He goes to the library immediately, nervous that if he doesn’t drop it off right away, she’ll assume Eddie isn’t going to write back at all. 

He waffles over which book to put it in before finally tucking it into The Fellowship of the ring–it’s the first in the trilogy, and Chrissy’s probably too cool to even know it’s a trilogy. 

There’s no response in his locker before Hellfire on Thursday, but that’s okay because true to her word, Chrissy shows up again. She’s smiling as she bounces through the doorway, all springy curls and happy cheer.

“Hi!” Chrissy says, waving as she beams her blinding smile around the room,  all that cheerleader enthusiasm on display.

Doug looks struck dumb, staring at her with his mouth open. Gareth’s gaze is darting back and forth from the door to Eddie, eyes growing wider and wider with each pass. Only Jeff smiles and waves back.

“I hope we’re not intruding,” Chrissy says, elbowing Harrington in the side until he finally looks up and gives his own half-hearted wave.

Because Harrington is slumped in the doorway behind her, looking like he’s trying to hide the entire bulk of his body behind Chrissy’s petite frame.

“Uh, hey,” he says, ears strangely pink as his eyes dart around the room.

He never looks Eddie’s way at all.

“Hey, man,” Jeff replies, the only person aside from Chrissy that is currently functioning.

“Steve, can come, right?” Chrissy asks, like he’s not already in the doorway behind her.

Eddie’s gut sinks then swoops. Harrington’s a jock—what will he do locked in a room with a bunch of nerds? But, the chipped nail polish.

Eddie’s mind is full of screaming, thoughts flip flopping over each other as he tries to articulate all the things wrong with Harrington coming to Hellfire, but all that comes out of his mouth is a chipper, “sure!”

Chrissy’s smile grows teeth—is she going to bite him?

Eddie resists the urge to take a step back.

Jeff pulls out the vacant seat beside him, still looking cool as a cucumber while the rest of them scramble. “Come sit down.”

And that’s how he finds himself with a jock in Hellfire. Should they call an exterminator?

It’s Chrissy who takes the seat beside Jeff which leaves the only other empty chair next to Eddie’s throne. Eddie glares at Gareth, gesturing wildly for his friend to move up a seat, but Gareth’s too busy staring at Harrington like he’s a cobra about to strike.

Harrington is looking at the only empty seat with the exact same expression.

“Steve,” Chrissy hisses, and Harrington jumps. “Go sit down.

The pink on his ears travels down to his cheeks—it’s unfair, really, how pretty and even his blush is. When Eddie blushes, he blotches bright red from forehead to chest.

Steve’s embarrassment suits him.

Eddie waits until he’s seated before clapping loud enough that everyone startles as they turn to him. “Now!” he starts in the grand voice he uses when he’s performing his Dungeon Master duties. “Are you two playing?”

“No,” Harrington rushes out, the pink of his blush deepening to a red as he finally meets Eddie’s eyes. “I mean, Chrissy said she just watched last time?”

“We didn’t want to slow you down,” Chrissy cuts in.

Eddie nods, looking between the couple as awkwardness stews in the stilted silence.

“Alright,” he replies. “Gird your loins, lords and lady.”

Knowing a cue when they hear one, the Hellfire boys scramble to pull out character sheets and dice.

And they’re off!

It takes a minute to fall into the familiar minutiae of telling a story with not one but two interlopers, but Eddie manages it. This is where he thrives: a captive audience and all the power to fuck with them in the palm of his hand.

He only stumbles once, words jumbling together when he looks up and catches Harrington staring at him, eyes wide, cheeks still flushed from his earlier embarrassment as he bites his lip, ass literally on the edge of his seat as Eddie cobbles together the climactic finish to their latest encounter.

Harrington looks away quickly, but Eddie knows what he saw: Harrington is into this nerd shit. He’d tease him if he wasn’t worried that it would end in a swirlie.

Still, Eddie can feel his head puffing up like an overfilled balloon. He’s on the top of his game, painting grand adventures with grander words, all gestures and enthusiasm. He feels electric, the way he always does when there’s a new sheep in his flock to impress. His skin’s almost buzzing with it.

After all, even if his audience member is a jock, Eddie’s always been great at putting on a show. 

Neither of the interlopers say anything until they’re busy packing up. Eddie lounges back in his throne, watching Chrissy help Jeff with his dice. She’s smiling up at him, clearly just as interested in their nerd shit as Harrington.

Eddie turns his eyes back to Harrington to see how he’s taking his girl talking to a guy that isn’t him only to find Harrington staring at him again.  When Eddie meets his eyes, he ducks his head, cheeks tinting that familiar pink.

Is Steve Harrington fucking awkward?

“You’re good at that,” Harrington says quietly.

Eddie hums, confused. He’s shuffling his papers back together, not looking down at what he’s doing. What’s happening in front of him is far more interesting.

“At what, big boy?”

“Uh,” Harrington starts, darting his eyes back up to Eddie’s for a second before looking back down at his fiddling hands. “Telling a story.”

Eddie smiles, something warm and amorphous filling his stomach. “Thanks,” he says, lightly kicking Harrington’s ankle.

Harrington twitches, lets out a quick, “mmhmm,” and then turns away from Eddie to go find his girlfriend, dismissing Eddie without another word.

“Ready to go, babe?” Steve asks, settling his arm around her waist and damn-near frog marching her out of the room.

“Bye, Jeff! Bye, Eddie!” Chrissy calls, still cheerful even as her boyfriend controls her every move. Maybe she’s used to it—first Carver and now Harrington. “See you next week?”

Neither of them wait for a reply.

The silence is stifling in their wake. Only Jeff seems unbothered as he stuffs all of his supplies into his backpack. Doug hasn’t even touched his dice.

“What the hell was that?” Gareth asks, whipping around to Eddie.

“How the hell should I know?”

Jeff snorts. “You invited them,” he says.

“I invited Chrissy,” Eddie whines. “She invited Harrington.”

That catches Jeff’s attention. He glares at Eddie like he’s the one that had invaded their sacred space. “You’re not this stupid,” he says, swinging his backpack onto his back and striding toward the door. “I’ve got a ride home, don’t wait for me.”

“What does that mean?” Eddie demands.

The only answer is the door swinging shut.

*** 

Once he’s walked Chrissy to her car and watched her pull out of the parking lot safe from Carver’s creepy hands, Steve collapses into his own car. He presses his face into the steering wheel and groans, long and loud, assured in his safe isolation. 

When the passenger door opens, he jumps, neck cracking with the speed at which he turns his head, ready to fight off the trespasser.

“Oh, it’s you,” Steve says, dropping his head back to the steering wheel.

“He knows,” Jeff says, voice serious enough that Steve raises his head back up immediately, heartbeat ratcheting up.

It takes a second for the words to connect, and when they do, his heartbeat quickens further, sweat pooling on the back of his neck, hands clenched hard enough on the steering wheel to hurt as fight or flight hits him.

“What?” he asks, the word cracking around his suddenly parched throat.

“Shit,” Jeff mutters, reaching out to pat Steve’s shoulder. “Not about you!”

Steve’s shoulders slump, breath shuddering out of him as Jeff continues to pat his shoulder, too awkward to be all that comforting. “Then, what—”

“He knows Chrissy is putting the notes in his locker.”

Steve sighs, slumping into his seat, uncaring of the way it crushes Jeff’s hand against the backrest. “Yeah, we figured,” he says, suddenly exhausted. “Do you know how?”

Jeff’s biting his lip when Steve looks his way. “He didn’t tell me,” he mutters. “But I know my best friend.”

It’s Steve’s turn to reach across the car and clasp Jeff’s shoulder. “I’m sure he has a reason for not telling you,” Steve replies, trying to smile past all that exhaustion.

Jeff snorts. “A stupid one, maybe.”

Steve hums, squeezing once more before dropping his hold on Jeff, suddenly realizing how stupid they must look, leaning toward each other, hands on each other’s shoulders like they’re having some sort of bro moment.

Steve turns back to the front of his car, cranks the engine, and smiles across at Jeff as the other boy takes the hint and drops his own hold. “Want a ride home?”

Instead of answering, Jeff puts on his seatbelt.

Jeff’s house is surprisingly close to Steve’s own. It’s a bit smaller than his, but there’s already a car in the driveway, and the shadows of silhouettes moving behind the pulled curtains, warm yellow light filtering through the fabric and onto the street.

Steve wishes he could go in with a fierce sort of longing that surprises him.

Jeff’s already got his seatbelt off and the passenger door open when he sighs, turning back around and settling back in his seat.

“You should come next week,” he says, all earnest in that way that seems to come so naturally to him and must have gotten him eaten alive in middle school.

“You can’t be serious,” Steve replies. There’s a tension headache growing, exasperated by the incredulous scrunching of his eyebrows. “That was a disaster.”

“Aw, it wasn’t that bad,” Jeff says, but he’s grinning like he’s remembering something funny. Steve’s got a few guesses what.

“Yeah, right.”

“I’m serious, man.” Jeff clasps his shoulder again—maybe that’s just something he does?

Steve scoffs, the roll of his eyes making his head pound. He opens his mouth to retort, something about Eddie’s reaction to Steve sitting beside him, but Jeff beats him to the punch.

“I know Eddie. And that in there?” He points back the way they’d come, like if Steve just strains his eyes, he’ll be able to catch sight of Eddie’s stupid fancy chair, and the stupid musty drama room, and the stupid look on Eddie’s face. “—is him interested.”

Steve closes his mouth, swallowing all the spit in his mouth, hoping it’s not audible to Jeff no matter how quiet the car is. “In me?” he asks, voice cracking embarrassingly.

Jeff doesn’t break eye contact, but his mouth twists uncomfortably. “Like you’re interested in him?” Jeff asks, continuing before Steve can reply. “I don’t know, man.”

Steve droops, the hope blooming in his chest curdling and sinking down into his stomach like old milk. He wants, desperately, to go home, turn out all the lights, and curl up alone in his bed to sleep away the rest of the day. But, Jeff’s still in his car, so he clenches the wheel between his fingers and says, “okay.”

“But, he doesn’t get you,” Jeff continues, voice gentling further. “And that intrigues him.”

Jeff’s still smiling like that should be some sort of boon to Steve’s ego, but it’s not. It lands like a brick. No one ever gets him, and whether he intrigues them or not, it always ends the same: him, alone in his big, empty house, waiting for a phone call that will never come, a doorbell that will never ring, a window that will never be snuck through.

He’d been through it before, with Donna in sixth grade, Nancy in tenth, hell, even Carol and Tommy for more years than he can count.

Intrigue has never gotten him anywhere. But, Jeff’s smiling, small and real, so Steve replies, “thanks, man,” smiling back until the other boy gets out of the car and he can safely drive away.

He’s got a dark house and a chilled bed waiting for him.

For the first time since this whole thing started, Steve writes the first draft of one of his secret admirer letters alone.

[pepsiboyy]

Could you do one where the boys are on a tour (in Australia maybe😏) and the reader gets like a backstage pass for her and he bff and reader is talking to Chris in the meet greet(earlier cause of the pass) and Chris seems to take interest in her so he slips his number in her pocket and she eventually finds and called the number confused and he picks it up and then after awhile of them talking back and forth Chris asks her out and they start dating blah blah blah (sorry for the in Australia maybe lol I just want them to do a tour here so I can meet em)

SAVE MY NUMBER.

pairing: chris sturniolo x fem!reader summary: the triplets are finally having an abroad tour and the reader purchased vip tickets with their best friend to meet them. what happens when she finds a stray set of numbers on her postcard when she gets back to the hotel? warnings: cursing, use of y/n!! a/n: thank u for the request love <3 i hope this is awesome sauce !! i tried so hard to make this enjoyable LOLL but i think it may have come out ok!! <3 lowercase intentional !!

my fingers anxiously picked at my shoes with one hand as my other hand scrolled through instagram.

"come on, y/n, aren't you excited!?" my best friend, harper, exclaimed as she gripped my shoulder and shook me rapidly.

with a soft nod and a small chuckle, i nodded as i locked my phone and let it fall into my lap. "of course i am. i'm just tired of sitting here."

we had been sitting in the sun on the side of the venue in line for the last hour and a half. it was that point in the day where the sun was beating directly onto us.

i had managed to get my best friend and i some tickets to the triplets' tour with the meet and greet pass. counting down the days was grueling, but we finally made it and the hardest part was now. waiting outside to be let into the building.

"it'll be worth it. who even cares?"

i nodded softly as i looked her up and down. she was decked out in purple, some purple stars drawn on her cheeks under her eyes and some purple cargo pants with a let's trip tee and some white air forces.

i, personally, was drowning in orange. with an orange crop top and deep gray ripped jeans, my outfit was topped off with orange nike high top dunks and an orange belt. my friend had helped me out with the orange stars, mine on the opposite side from harper's.

"y/n, the line is moving!"

i turned my head to harper, being ripped from my thoughts before quickly standing to my feet and moving up in line.

the line moved slow, but it was something.

we still had a long way to go.

-

the line for the meet and greet felt like it was forever, but as we got closer, i felt like no time had passed at all. i could see them every once in a while through the lit cloth between the line and the boys, and my eyes shifted to harper. "dude, we're almost there." i chuckled, trying to keep myself as calm as possible as harper made noises i didn't even know were humanly possible.

"y/n, i don't know what to do or say, i think i might shit myself."

i slammed a hand over harper's mouth and let out a cackle, shaking my head. "shh, say that less loud." i scoffed and before i knew it, harper was next in line.

my hands toyed with the orange belt that helped my jeans hug my hips, my eyes glued in front of me as i watched the three boys.

the three boys i watched at first every once in a while when they appeared on my for you page, but i quickly became a huge supporter of the triplets, and they were somewhat a coping mechanism for me when things were hard.

and now i'm meeting them.

"next!"

i shot harper a smile and tapped her shoulder. "you got it!" i smiled brightly and waved as she approached matt.

i felt a lump develop in my throat. this was bad.

it wasn't a crying lump, but an anxious lump. unfortunately, when i get nervous, i can't help but ramble and yap.

"next!"

no way time flew by that fast. as i approached matt, i swallowed and smiled brightly as i felt like each step that i took was in slow motion.

matt's arms opened and i quickly stepped towards him and hugged him tightly. "hi, matt," i breathed, taking a deep breath as the reality of the situation began to settle.

"what's your name?" he asked softly, picking up his photo and signing it quickly.

"oh, it's y/n," i breathed, the smile on my face so wild you could have probably found me in a horror movie.

"nice to meet you, y/n. i hope we haven't kept you waiting too long?" he questioned, and i quickly shook my head.

"i'm just happy you guys are here," i breathed and smiled brightly at him before my expression fell. "oh my god a picture-" i scrambled to reach and get my phone from my back pocket, opening my camera and lifting it up.

two bright smiles later, matt pulled me into one more hug and smiled brightly, while i wished him luck on the rest of the tour.

i turned to see nick and smiled brightly, pulling him into a deep hug. i always had a theory that nick gave the best hugs of the three. so far, my theory was correct.

"hi, friend!" nick cheered, signing his card and smiling at me. "your star makeup is so cute, your friend had the same thing, no?"

i smiled brightly and nodded, biting my lip. "yeah, she did them for me actually! she's the best." i smiled and pulled out my phone.

"i'm so glad you guys could come." he stated as he wrapped an arm around me and held up a thumbs up in the camera.

i smiled brightly as i pulled away and gave him one last hug. "you guys are amazing. i just thought you should know, i'm proud of you guys. good luck tonight!" i told nick as i pulled from the hug. nick shot me a soft and quick thank you as i was rushed off to the final triplet.

christopher sturniolo.

i felt my entire being crumble the moment i took a few steps forward.

of course, i loved all three of the triplets with everything i had.

but chris.. i related to him in many ways and always found my eyes gravitating to him while watching their videos. he's a silly guy, and it doesn't help that i find him insanely attractive between the three.

"you in there?"

my eyes shot to chris as i let out a breath i didn't know i was holding.

i literally just spaced out in front of chris, who waved his hand in front of me to snap me out of my trance.

not to mention i'm decked out in his color.

"hi!" i squeaked, and he pulled me into a hug.

i bit my lip as i hugged him tightly, taking a deep breath.

the hug lasted for a little longer than needed, but i wasn't complaining.

not sure if it's because it's chris or not, but i think nick has some competition for best hug.

"i like your outfit," chris stated softly as he pulled away from the hug. i smiled brightly at him, and i couldn't tell if i was gaslighting myself or if he licked his lips while looking at my orange self.

"thanks, i don't really wear much orange," i stated and i felt my face heat up.

"it's definitely your color more than it is mine. consider wearing it more often?" he asked, writing on the card and pausing before deciding to hand it to me. "wanna take a selfie?"

i nodded quickly and shakily took out my phone and began to raise it, but chris carefully took it from my hands and raised it himself, wrapping his other arm around my shoulders softly.

he took about four photos and handed me the phone back.

after signing the card, taking a little longer than usual, he looked me up and down one more time.

we stood there for a few moments, simply looking at each other and i noticed my friend waving at me from behind chris, about ten feet away.

"you're gonna do great tonight," i quickly said to him, and he simply smiled at me and nodded, running his fingers through his hair to adjust his bangs.

holy fuck, this guy isn't real.

"i'll do great because you came. thanks for coming." he stated softly, and brought me into a tight hug.

i bit my lip hard as i hugged him back, taking in a deep breath.

-

the night went incredibly well. the show was enjoyable with the games they all played, and i told harper about the interaction i had with chris.

harper was in the shower. i had just gotten out, my pajama pants and small black tshirt hugging my body perfectly as i laid against my bed in the hotel.

i turned to the postcards, smiling brightly as i took them into my hands and admired them. i turned them in the light to look at the layered marker, holding them towards the lamp. as i got to chris's, i noticed some writing on the back through the light and my heart jumped out of my chest.

i threw myself up off the mattress and flipped the postcard over, feeling my heartrate pick up at the phone number written against the back.

"dude, the shampoo in there is awesome. you weren't kidding." harper stated as she dried her hair in a towel as she sat in front of me, also in her pajamas. "you okay?"

i looked at her and slowly held up the card, pointing at the number.

"holy fuck, is that..?" harper trailed off, and i bit my lip.

"oh my god, i need to call it." i stated as i searched for my phone under the comforter, quickly retrieving it and dialing the number.

i put my phone on speaker as i looked at harper, my leg bouncing anxiously.

"hello?"

my heart sank.

"h- hello?"

i mentally cursed at myself for stuttering.

"who is this?"

"uhh, it's y/n, i found this number on the back of my postcard-" i was quickly cut off.

"y/n!" he cheered. "it's chris."

"are you fucking for real?" i whispered, biting my lip.

"yes ma'am." he chuckled, and i shook my head. there's no way this is fucking happening right now.

"i know it's late and you guys probably have jet lag, so i'm sorry, but i just found it-"

"it's fine, really, i was running fortnite with matt." he stated quickly, cutting me off.

i snorted. it made sense.

"well, get a victory royale ok?"

"for you, i will. save my number, i'll text you." chris stated, and i looked at harper who was in utter shock.

"right, yeah i will." i stated quickly, and hung up afterwards.

silence overcame harper and i before i bit my lip and we both screamed at the top of our lungs at the same time.

there was no way this was real.

-

my eyes were beginning to shut as the video of the triplets from a few weeks ago seemed to be watching me.

i turned to harper, who had fallen asleep a little while ago and blinked a few times when my phone vibrated and chris's name appeared on my screen.

a bright smile took over my face as i began texting him, and my night was made even more. somehow.

[bri-the-nautilus]

Come To the Dark Side, We Have Hot Guys: A Star Wars Story

Spoilers below for S1 of Ahsoka and the first six episodes of The Acolyte.

I'm writing this with The Acolyte most of the way through airing its first season, with episode 6 having released earlier today. Say what you will about the show, but it's really brought out a lot of the uglier sides of the Star Wars fandom. Everyone and their mother has seen videos or Reddit threads dunking on the Critical Drinker or SWT and their mouth-breathing misogynist audiences at this point, so I don't feel particularly compelled to retread that ground. Instead, I want to talk about the... other side of the fandom, the hypocrisy therein, and how we're all being played for absolute fools by the creative team at Disney Lucasfilm.

Yes, this post is about Qimir.

Now I want to say that I have no problem with villain simping/shipping. Far from it. Most of my posts on this account are me simping for Shin Hati (we'll talk more about her later) or various Soulsborne bosses. Hell, my mutuals and I have a running joke about me having a weakness for evil blonde women. While I personally am too gay for my own good and couldn't care less about men as a concept, I absolutely see the appeal of characters like Qimir and Kylo Ren. I absolutely get why people thirst over them and love making fandom content for them. I think Qimir/Osha has the potential to be a really fun ship, actually. The point I'm making here is not "simping for these characters is wrong and bad," and I want to make that crystal clear before we continue.

That said, let's talk about Qimir, and how the landscape of the show and its surrounding discourse has changed since his reveal. Again, I'm ignoring the chud sphere here, partly because their little corner of the Internet has remained remarkably stagnant since then. The podcast bros still think it's woke, fucking Shadiversity is still whining about fight choreography (which as someone who actually has done HEMA/stage combat, Shad annoys me to no end, but that's an entirely separate can of worms), and it all seems to be business as usual over there. No, the most marked changes have been on the Acolyte-positive end of the fandom space. Here's what the top posts in "hashtag TheAcolyte" on Twitter look like tonight:

You get the idea.

Again, no hate to any of these people. This is tumblr ffs, we've all engaged in a little simping for a morally dubious hot person. I love seeing fans having fun engaging with something, and again I kinda dig the Osha/Qimir ship.

Anyways, if you were around for the Acolyte-positive discourse before the Qimir reveal, and especially the show's marketing and the reponse to that, you'll have noticed a marked difference.

Fans quickly began to see The Acolyte as " the gayest Star Wars ever." Showrunner Leslye Headland is an out lesbian, and her wife was cast as Master Vernestra Rwoh. Archetypical girlboss Carrie-Anne Moss was cast as Master Indara, immediately drawing comparisons to her role in the Matrix movies. Leads Osha and Mae Aniseya are played by the nonbinary Amandla Stenberg. The lesbian witches of Brendok were talked about in press releases before the show aired. Dafne Keen (Jecki Lon) stated in an interview that she portrayed the short-haired, serious Theelin as having a crush on Osha, something that fans were picking up on in their first interactions in the premiere before Keen even gave that interview. While Headland said in a post-premiere interview that she didn't set out specifically to make "a capital Q Queer show," it's an objective fact that no Star Wars movie/show has had as much potential in that area, and fans (especially the queer community) took notice. (For what it's worth, in the same interview Headland commented that she was proud of creating something that so many queer fans identified with.)

The show came out, and Master Indara was killed off in the first sequence, which I'm honestly fine with. It was a good scene and works on a lot of levels. Headland's aforementioned interview came and went. Episode three aired. The lesbian witches turned out to be even gayer than was previously thought possible, and people ate that shit up while the Critical Drinker's brain suffered a major cascade failure. Jecki became a runaway favorite in the premiere and episode four, as did lovable himbo Yord Fandar and the wise, paternalistic Master Sol. In Acolyte-positive circles, this was basically how it went. People thought Brendok was cool, the Yord Horde became the show's biggest social media sensation, Jecki and Sol cultivated devoted followings alongside Osha and Mae, there were a wealth of different ships involving various combinations of Jecki, Yord, and the twins... you get the idea.

Then episode 5 happened.

The writing was really on the wall when the Brendok coven was abruptly wiped out. Introducting such an interesting (and queer) Force-wielding culture only to exterminate them in the same episode was certainly a choice that somebody made. But episode 5 was a shock to the system for many fans, as the show's resident Sith revealed himself and killed Jecki and Yord in some of the most brutal recent onscreen deaths in Star Wars. To be clear, I think this was a great sequence. Two beloved main characters being suddenly and gruesomely killed off was a masterfully executed shock to the system, especially after viewers were lulled into a false sense of security by all the redshirt deaths in the previous scene.

This, understandably, completely changed the landscape of the Acolyte fandom. Virtually overnight, much of the simping and shipping involving Jecki and Yord dried up, and once the dust had settled as far as the "rip blorbo, gone too soon" posts went, what remained were the usual Sol/twins offerings and a wave of Qimir hype. Which is understandable. He's a badass emo Sith boy with a cool helmet who brutally murdered fan favorite characters in front of us and has palpable tension with the female lead. Who wouldn't love... wait a minute.

This feels familiar somehow.

But if you close your eyes, does it almost feel like nothing's changed at all?

And just like that, "the gayest Star Wars" is all about the (straight) sexual tension between an edgy, murderous Sith boy and a light-side girl plagued by dark thoughts whose friends said boy just killed. This is all eerily similar to how the Sequel Trilogy focused on Rey and Kylo while abruptly dropping Finn and Poe's character arcs. Even the fandom discourse is the same. I mean Reylo was so ubiquitous back in the day that it became a derogatory catch-all for good girl/evil boy shipping. Multiple authors now have either gotten their initial start/fame writing Reylo fics, or straight up published legally distinct Reylo fiction after the fashion of Netflix's After. You had the occasional person piping up to say "hey they kind of just left Finn and Poe hanging after TFA, it would've been cool if they got together but at the very least don't relegate them to being side characters/comic relief in separate story threads," and that was it. The same thing is going on with The Acolyte now, only the sequel trilogy wasn't marketed on the strength of being a queer story by a queer creative team. The Acolyte is, which makes it all the more baffling that by the midway point of the first season, all the gays have been buried and the show seems to be heading straight for Reylo 2: High Republic Boogaloo. And the fans are eating it up.

As an interesting aside, I think it's an interesting exercise to contrast the Kylo/Qimir pattern with the broader fandom's treatment of Shin Hati (told you we'd circle back to that), and the ship between her and Sabine Wren. On paper, Shin is very similar to Kylo and Qimir. Villain? Check. Edgy-looking armor? Totes. Emotionally damaged/stunted in some way? Sure looks like it. Tension with the heroine? You betcha. If anything, the only major difference is that Shin isn't as evil as the others. Compare her actions in Ahsoka (clearing out part of a light cruiser with Baylan and making repeated attempts on Sabine's life) to Kylo (oversees multiple war crimes, kills his fan-favorite dad) or Qimir (orchestrates the murders of several Jedi before brutally executing two fan-favorite characters). She's definitely bad, but I struggle to see her as on par with Qimir, let alone fucking Kylo, in terms of evilness.

Which makes it all the more interesting to me that the Shin/Sabine ship has received so much more mainstream skepticism/criticism than the Osha/Qimir or Rey/Kylo ships. "They have no chemistry!" "She's an evil murderer!" "She's a blank slate!" "Sabine is taken!" I may be a touch biased, but from where I sit a large part of the fandom, even the ostensibly progressive side, seems to look down upon Shin/Sabine shippers while swooning for heterosexual variants with far more evil villains.

This isn't a monolith, and I can't stress that enough. I'm not trying to start shit here. Villain shipping is awesome. We support women's wrongs in this house. You do see the occasional person decrying Reylo or Osha/Qimir as toxic, which I think is fairly unnecessary. Like yeah, maybe it's a toxic dynamic, but these are fictional characters. For these specific characters, part of the crowd appeal is the toxic badboy side of things. I don't think we should really spend much energy attacking any fictional ship (between adults, mind you) as toxic, which is why it puzzles me that an as-yet-unconfirmed lesbian ship in a niche show receives such a large proportion of this sort of criticism compared to the canon relationship between two main characters of a blockbuster trilogy.

At the end of the day, this whole affair has been rather sobering for me on both Disney Lucasfilm and the Star Wars fandom. For all the support the Shin/Sabine ship has received from Ahsoka cast members Ivanna Sakhno (Shin), Natasha Liu Bordizzo (Sabine), Eman Esfandi (Ezra Bridger, the other character people like to ship with Sabine), and Rosario Dawson (Ahsoka), I'm rather sour on the prospects of it becoming canon. The sequel trilogy dropped the ball on what many saw as a promising chance for an MLM romance between Finn and Poe in favor of trotting out the "why do good girls like bad boys" dynamic, and The Acolyte, "the gay show" overseen by a lesbian, has seemingly shifted to center a similar dynamic after killing off most of its prospects for a queer relationship among the main cast. Simply put, I think that Disney as an international company based in the frighteningly divided United States is reluctant to commit to anything beyond lipservice in terms of LGBT representation in their movies/shows, which again doesn't leave me feeling optimistic about WolfWren's canon potential. And the fandom takes the bait. People love the damaged evil badboy/good girl dynamic, and when the queer fandom suggests the possibility of a queer ship taking center stage in a show with no other extant relationships, even the more progressive side of the fandom tends to either ignore it or actively push back on its basis in reality until Disney Lucasfilm inevitably puts the kibosh on it. The amount of times I've heard people dismiss WolfWren for the same reasons they now like Osha/Qimir and liked Reylo (before that ship was fleshed out/canonicalized, anyway) is ridiculous, but at the end of the day you kinda feel stupid for expecting anything else. Again, I think Qimir is a cool character and I'm as much of a sucker for villain romances as the next girlie, but seeing how easily the fandom lets dangling heterosexual carrots lead it away from Disney Lucasfilm's broken promises of queer rep is a sobering ordeal.

[see-arcane]

Alright, slightly more coherent now

Yes! YES! Mina's heart-eyes were coming through at full volume when describing her Jonathan riding up, terrifying the guarding crowd out of his way, leaping on the wagon, and Lifting the Whole Box o' Dracula over his head just to slam dunk it on the ground. It was exactly as, "Dear Diary, I knew that now wasn't the time to climb my husband like a vampire-chucking cryptid tree, and I hated that, but I was so brave about it" as I was hoping it'd be

Oh man, the final Dracu-cackle was delightful. The big mounting villainous laugh building to its horror story crescendo...only to have Jonathan K.(ukri) Harker slice right through the bastard's neck as he chokes and gurgles. Plus the Bowie heart staking as punctuation. Magnificent. Delicious. Stupendous. The Power of Love is here to collect your fucking head, buddy, 1000/10 stars

And then. Quincey. Oh God, Quincey. This is the first time in the entire series--in any podcast series--that I laid where I was and cried. Listening to this good man bleed and smile and die the way I had always known he would, but the wound of it hurting so much more than mourning a sheet of paper had. The acting. The sound design. The music, both there and in the parting song. It carved my heart out. And it was great.

One. More. Episode. I am not ready to hear it. I am not ready for this ride to be over. But I can't wait regardless. It's a day early, but thank you for all of this @re-dracula. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

[si11yw0rm]

WORDS. | PART I

blurb: ghost and you have had a complicated relationship. but one night in the kitchen changes everything between the two of you.

tags: gender-neutral reader, dirty talk, use of doll, baby, and love, dual switching (you would understand when you see it)

wordcount: 2k+

a/n: worm is tired. if you see this, please make them smile by leaving comments about what you thought. (please, i am typing this from a hospital bed, anything but the doctors saying bs would make me happy) i'll probably put out a part two to this, we would see. until we meet again, i shall slink back to my cave. mdni x fic under the cut.

Ghost was not a very vocal man. Everyone on the base knew that. You knew how silent he could be, even better than anyone else. He had made sure of that.

You stirred the cup of hot chocolate, shaking your head a little. It was one of the reasons you were instantly drawn to him. You were a fan of silence, just like he was. 

Sometimes, words weren't necessary.

Your relationship with Ghost was a tricky one.

When Captain Price introduced you to the crew the first time you had landed on base, you knew he didn't like you straightaway.

For someone so silent, his eyes could be widely expressive. 

Ghost never sought you out, and you respected his wishes and kept out of his way.

And it worked until that one night.

The single night that changed you both forever.

 The roof was open to anyone, but for some weird reason, you didn't expect Ghost to be the person to climb up your spot and find you that night.  

You knew he was surprised to find you there staring at the stars because even in the darkness of that night, you could see his hesitation.  

But he had stayed, and it was a silent agreement that it would be routine. 

And it was. 

Except for where you both went on missions and Price took the team out for drinks, your two souls always found yourselves on the roof every night. 

Not saying anything. 

Just breathing and existing in the same space. 

Till you broke the silence one night, and by some miraculous intervention, he had answered. 

You knew it wasn't right. 

Sneaking behind the other members' backs. Especially Price. 

But for some reason, you couldn't care. 

And you knew the Lieutenant didn't either. 

You nearly spilt the beverage over your fingers as you remembered how he had stared at you last night, his eyes saying everything and nothing all at once.

You knew it was cowardly to avoid going to the rooftop tonight, but you couldn't see yourself facing him. 

Then you heard a cough.

It was unmistakably him. 

You weren't surprised you hadn't heard him moving, but as you turned around, you froze when you saw him standing in the doorway.

Ghost couldn't believe his luck. When he hadn't seen you tonight, he had nearly pulled his gun on himself. 

But here you were, standing directly in front of him, looking like his every fantasy just come to life, and he just knew.

He had to get the words out. He had to. 

They were clawing at his throat. 

He could practically feel them burning a hole in his chest. 

He cleared his throat, grabbing the bottom of his mask, and tugged it downwards before stepping closer. 

You looked so sad and heartbroken that he could feel his cold heart moving around funny in his chest.

"I lied." It was a stupid way to start, and he knew it. 

Your eyes narrowed, and he could see the anger simmering in them.

You had every right to be angry. 

And fuck, if he didn't want to fuck it out of you.  

"What?" You hissed the word out, folding your arms, and fuck him, but he couldn't stop his hands from dropping to your chest. 

You didn't look at him as you hissed again, grabbing the cup off the counter. He could bet that you wanted to dunk it over his head.

"What do you mean you lied, Riley?" 

He knew you were mad when you called him that. 

He was always Lieutenant. 

You always called him that during your missions together over the comms. 

Fuck, now that he thought of it, you mostly referred to him as lieutenant. 

And he knew it was most definitely out of necessity.

But on the rarest occasions that you were happy with him, you called him Simon, and he let you. 

Because he had never met anyone that captivated him as much as you did. 

So yes, in hindsight, you should be mad.

Because it was one of your rules. 

Never lie. 

Lie to everyone but each other.

But Christ, he was a sick bastard because as he looked at you now, he finally understood what Price meant by you being a force of nature.

He was in awe of you. 

Which also terrified the hell out of him too.

His brain reminded him that he had said that before, but he couldn't find it in him to begin to actually care. 

"I lied. When you asked me if I thought about you." 

Oh, he did.

In the nights when you both denied yourself what could be the most divine bliss.

He did. 

During breakfast.

During lunch.

During dinner. 

And after your rooftop nights, when he was alone in his dorm, that was when he couldn't help himself.

He was in over his head. 

So much so it was both fascinating and terrifying. You should be scared of what he could do to you if you just gave him your consent. 

Your jaw dropped, and your eyes got that hazy look in them. 

The look you always had when your mind went south. Ghost knew you didn't realize it, but he could always read you like a book.

A book he was becoming fast obsessed with.

"So you think about me?" Your voice was hesitant, and he nearly laughed. 

You couldn't be that clueless, considering everyone on base already knew he more than liked you.

He released his breath through his teeth, shaking his head. "You have no idea, love." 

He knew what you were going to say before you even said it.

"Tell me. Let me in, Simon. Please." 

His head lifted, and he saw the pleading in your eyes. He hissed through his teeth, holding his head in his hands. 

He couldn't bear to look at you. He knew you liked it the way he did. 

So what was holding him back?

You sighed, and Ghost could hear that telltale disappointment lining your voice.

The unspoken one you had every time he couldn't voice out his emotions. 

You shook your head slowly and shook your head, holding your cup to your chest before dropping back on the counter. "It's okay, Ghost." 

But Ghost couldn't let you leave without telling you. 

He grabbed your arm and tugged you around until you were staring at him, your eyes both sad and understanding. It tore a hole through him.

His hands slid up your arm, coming to rest on your cheek. Even through the glove he was wearing, you could feel his hand burning against your skin. 

He leaned closer, his lips brushing your neck as his hand dropped from your cheek to slip around your waist. 

"I...I want you. I think about you." His voice was uncertain at first, but the conviction in them had you freezing.

"Every hour. Every minute. Every day. God, love. You have me burning me up inside." 

You felt your breath shudder through your lungs, and Ghost leaned away, staring at your lips. He was staring at them like he suddenly wanted to put something inside. 

"I...I think about you. On your knees. In my bed. Everywhere." You couldn't control how fast your breath was coming out of your lungs like you weren't getting enough air in your lungs.

You knew what it meant. The exact cause of your reaction came from childhood trauma you refused to unpack. But you saw the precise minute that Ghost's eyes widened with realization. 

Ghost couldn't believe his luck. His little brat was a word slut.

You, who blushed and shied away from looking anyone in the eye during briefings, loved someone looking at you and talking you through it. 

And knowing it had the knot in his tongue loosening. 

He stepped closer, pinning you against the counter, his hands resting on the counter behind you.

"I think of touching you under the table, especially when we have briefings together."

What was it with him and your briefings? God, he was so far gone. 

He had always wondered why Price gave him an unreadable look after briefings, but now he understood. 

He must have been staring.

His hands left the counter, coming under your thighs to grab you off the ground and drop you on the counter, his hands shifting to spread your thighs apart. 

"I think of grabbing you by the throat and giving you something to choke on. I think of spreading your thighs apart and fucking drowning you, baby. You have no idea."

You weren't sure if you were still breathing normally, and you could feel your head swimming. Somehow, the look of pure desire burning in his eyes was just as dangerous as his words.

Because this was Simon.

"And I think of you blowing me while you are under my table, and it's our little secret." 

His hands slid up your jaw, and his thumb parted your lips, sliding inside your mouth. You didn't think twice before wrapping your lips around it.

Ghost smiled. "You know when you walked into my office that night to grab the files Price asked about?" 

You nodded, and when your eyes shuttered, Ghost knew you hadn't realized that you were purring softly. 

"Afterwards, my office smelt like you so much I was sure I had nearly gone mad." 

"You hide your feelings well." You whispered, your lips still around his thumb. Your eyes were half closed, and you were practically resting your cheek on his palm.

"I was scared."

Your eyes snapped open, and you blinked slowly, smiling at him. "Are you scared now?"

"Yes." He decided to keep it short.

You let go of his thumb, pulling him closer by wrapping your legs around his hips. He stalled himself from connecting your groins together by slamming his hand on the counter.

You smiled, and Ghost knew whatever you had planned was going to be the death of him. 

"That undercover party that Price sent us on. The one where I wore the bunny outfit. You seemed pissed after Soap made a barrack bunny joke. What were you thinking?"

He wanted to say he didn't know what the fuck you were talking about, but he did. 

It was one of the nights he couldn't stop replaying in his head.

"You mean the night where you kept talking sass and outrightly disobeyed me? And then got yourself in trouble. Like I fucking warned you it would? Is that the night you are talking about, doll?" 

You opened your mouth to talk, but Ghost suddenly had a lot to say and it was all coming out.

"God, when you bent over answering that man. It was all I could think about. Spanking you. You were literally begging for it, doll." 

"Wha-What?"

"It made me a sick and twisted man, but Jesus. I wanted to spank your ass red for letting him touch you."

"Oh yeah? You are fucking hypocrite, Ghost. Because you ran out like you couldn't wait to move away from me fast enough." 

Ghost knew you well enough to know you were teasing. You were poking him. Seeing how far you could take him before he snapped, but lucky for you, he was feeling generous.

"Say what you want, baby." 

"Touch me. Like you do in your thoughts. Just once. I need in, Simon. Please."

The Simon was his kryptonite.

He laughed, pushing you back against the counter as his hands dipped down your stomach, lifting your shirt enough to expose your belly.

You held your breath as his hands dipped lower, and he tsked, his fingers brushing against you so suddenly that your back arched off the counter.

What was it about him that made you feel things so intensely?

"You are such a little whore, baby. Look at you. Dripping. And I haven't even touched you yet." 

His hand came up to cover your eyes, and you heard rustling before you finally felt his breath ghost your nose. 

He had taken off his mask.

"Simon..."

His lips nuzzled your nose before kissing a path down your jaw, deliberately avoiding your lips. "Keep saying my name, baby."

His fingers were sliding up your waist, inching your shirt higher, and coming to rest directly under your nipple.

"Simon..."

"That's it. Who's touching you?" His voice had gotten so rough and deep it was like it was vibrating through you, leaving you wrung out and breathless with desire. 

"Simon is."

"That's right, baby." His hand lifted off your eyes suddenly, and you saw a flash of a sharp jawline before he yanked your shirt so far up that he could pull it over your head.

"Can you breathe through the cotton?" You saw his silhouette hovering over you, but you could barely make out his features. You also noticed that he had only pulled the mask halfway up his face.

"Yeah." 

"Perfect, baby. Now, try not to scream."

[yuseirra]

I really enjoy drawing them as gods! :) I'll keep drawing this version too while I can (and even after things clear up~)

I jotted about these guys earlier AGAIN and it's so funny, I'll put it in the read more

(was written in another language, translated in bulk by chatgpt~)

I set up my tablet to draw all weekend and started listening to Fatal again.

Seriously, this song… it’s just Kamiki, saying, “I can’t live without Ai~~ I want to see Ai so badly… Without her, I’m really going to die, I feel like I’ll die—what am I supposed to do?” That’s exactly what it sounds like.

It’s like Ai is Ame-no-Uzume, and Kamiki is her husband. He’s like a god who lost his wife and went completely insane. I can’t hear it any other way, seriously. If this isn’t the case, I’d be so disappointed! There’s just no other explanation for all the bizarre situations in the story. Every time I hear this song, I feel like I’m losing my mind because of this interpretation…

This isn’t Aqua. Right now, Aqua let go of his wish for Ai and is sinking deeper as he saves Ruby. No, it’s Kamiki who’s crying about not being able to live without Ai, wanting to see her that badly. What are we supposed to do with him? Why does he love Ai this much? (To be fair, the backstory is there. Watching his character unfold, I thought, "Yeah, it makes sense he’d fall for Ai.” Even before the song and Chapter 154 came out, I was certain of it.) He’s the only character who’d have such a “lack of Ai.” He lost Ai, and now he’s like, “My destiny is to get her back!” I’m sure that’s what’s driving him. He studied science in college, built a company, and went around doing all these things while telling himself, “It’s my fault, my fault,” and witnessing people dying. Seriously… what is this?

And his eyes—I feel they were originally golden, but it feels like something mixed in because of that black star, which changed the color. His eyes look so murky. I don’t think they were meant to be purple. Every other character has clear eyes, but whenever they show his in the anime, his color is cloudy, almost like something else is mixed in.

The Hoshino family’s eye colors connect to their names, but Kamiki’s name means “light,” so why the sudden purple? It could be, but his eyes look so cloudy, and no other character’s eyes have that quality. He’s not in his right mind… he really seems possessed. And why are the lyrics like this? Why do they have this meaning? If this isn’t revealed, I’m going to seek out the author myself. It’s almost funny. This song is just so strange.

It sounds like constant crying—a song of intense longing, he’s losing his mind. Once again, this isn’t Aqua’s emotional arc. Kamiki’s emotions are ten steps deeper than Aqua’s, maybe even more unhinged. He literally seems unable to live without Ai. But this makes sense if they’re a divine couple; they literally can’t function without each other. They need to be together, which even aligns with the things Kamiki says in the story. He was hers and she was his- What is he, really? He isn’t your average person. He’s genuinely strange. What he does is something that can't just be explained with charisma or “because he’s charming.” No, Ai and Kamiki must have originally been gods.

Honestly, Kamiki must be a god who was deeply devoted to his wife, driven to madness because people killed her. That’s why Aqua was assigned to dunk him into the sea to get him… This storyline would make so much more sense if this is it.

Ai must be crying in heaven if she sees what’s become of her husband. It’s so absurdly tragic. I feel like this direction would make more sense. I mean, what kind of story would it be if Kamiki were just “the bad guy”? We already know he was fundamentally a good person. How could an ordinary person even do all these things? I know the setting is modern, with cell phones, electronics, law enforcement, etc. But honestly, people buying into this guy’s ideals to this degree is baffling. He could only pull this off if he were a god.

Fatal… I’m sure I’ve shared my thoughts on this song countless times, but every time I listen to it, I feel like I’m one step closer to understanding its meaning. This song’s emotions are just so Kamiki. If this is Kamiki, though… well, he must really have loved Ai. He’s struggling so much, and you can really feel what it means to not be able to live without someone. He simply can't bear it. That’s how strong his love is.

At this point, can’t we just let him meet Ai again already? He fell apart because he couldn’t see her, even though he wanted to so badly. Was he really at fault for all of this? Is he actually responsible for Ai’s death? I don’t think so… If Ai had been there, he probably wouldn’t have ended up like this.

We need to find out the real reason Ai died, don’t we? This song has to mean something, right? There has to be a reason this song came out. I wouldn’t have started down this path if I didn’t feel I already knew the answer. If I were the author, I’d never make a character who wants to see Ai so desperately into her killer. Maybe Kamiki has some godly power that became unstable out of his anxiety, causing the chain of events that led to her death, but...

Now that we know Ai truly loved Kamiki, I can’t believe he’d even lay a finger on her. It just doesn’t fit his character or story. His behavior shows he isn’t capable of that. This is the same person who couldn’t even retaliate against people who treated him horribly, even those he cared less about than Ai. He was a kind person.

Looking at Kamiki’s consistent behavior, there’s always this gentleness, almost peacefulness. Even if he’s lost it now, that gentleness seems closer to his true nature. I feel like something forced its way into him and twisted him.

The person Ai loved was probably this part of Kamiki, the gentle exterior. If you look at it, it makes sense why she’d fall for him. He’s fundamentally that kind of person, but something happened to him.

I’m rarely wrong about things like this… There aren’t many chapters left now, so if I’m wrong, I’ll just take it as it comes.

Was Kamiki really the kind of person Aqua could treat that way? Honestly, I wasn’t satisfied watching the interactions between Tsukuyomi and Aqua. It didn’t feel good to watch them connect and talk sympathetically. Plus, if it turns out Ai loved someone who was truly insane, that’s another problem.

If Kamiki really did do horrible things, it would make more sense if they were god-level punishments from a god who went insane. If he were just a regular boy who lost it and became a serial killer… what even is that? That would be so disrespectful to people who have similar backgrounds. For a character like this, I feel like there should be a certain amount of care in how he’s handled. Otherwise, I'd really be upset. I’m sure the author understands that.

Anyway… it feels like the answer’s already in the song. Like the answer’s already been given. There aren’t many chapters left, so I guess we’ll find out soon.

[traldemic6]

From Jocks to Blocks: The High School Athlete's Surprising Journey to Obesity in College - A Comprehensive Study

Abstract:

The transition from high school to college is a critical period for many young adults, with numerous changes affecting health and behavior. This longitudinal study explores the correlation between obesity and the decline in physical activity among college males who were previously athletic in high school. Interviews with college students are utilized to provide insights into lifestyle changes and decision-making, while multiple weigh-ins track body changes over time.

Introduction:

Remember those athletic high school boys who once dominated the sports field, garnering admiration from their peers and inspiring dreams of athletic glory? It turns out that many of them may be trading their jerseys for XXL sweatpants as they navigate their way through college. While it is not uncommon for college students to experience weight gain during their transition to higher education, this study focuses on the unique phenomenon of formerly athletic high school males falling victim to obesity. The irony of these young men, once admired for their physical prowess, now succumbing to a sedentary lifestyle is examined in detail.

Methods:

A sample of 400 male college students, ages 18-22, were selected based on their athletic involvement in high school. Participants were enrolled in various colleges across the United States, representing diverse backgrounds and areas. Interviews were conducted to gather information on their exercise habits, dietary choices, and lifestyle factors that contributed to their weight gain. Multiple weigh-ins were performed throughout the study to track changes in body weight and composition.

Results:

As college life progressed, many of our once-athletic participants found themselves tipping the scales in a way that would make their high school coaches weep. By their sophomore year, the average weight gain was approximately 25 pounds, with a significant increase in body fat percentage. During interviews, participants cited a variety of factors contributing to their expanding waistlines, including reduced physical activity, increased alcohol consumption, and poor food choices.

To illustrate the physical transformations, let's take a closer look at some of our interviewees and their less-than-brilliant insights:

Participant A: The Former Quarterback

Weighing in at a once-impressive 185 pounds, this football star was the epitome of high school athleticism. However, by sophomore year, he had ballooned to a staggering 245 pounds. While his throwing arm may have remained strong, the added weight made maneuvering around the buffet table his new sport of choice. When asked about his weight gain, he eloquently stated, "I dunno, man. I just, like, eat a lot now, and I don't, like, run or anything anymore. It's college, you know?"

Participant B: The Track Star Turned Couch Potato

This once-speedy sprinter now found himself huffing and puffing just to make it up a flight of stairs. His college experience saw him gain over 30 pounds, with his once-chiseled calves now hidden beneath a layer of fat. Evidently, the only thing he's racing now is the delivery driver to his door. During his interview, he mused, "Yeah, I guess I just like pizza more than running now. Who would've thought, right?"

Participant C: The Wrestler Now Grappling with Obesity

Once a formidable presence on the wrestling mat, this participant's newfound girth rendered him more suited for sumo than high school wrestling. Gaining a whopping 35 pounds during his freshman year, he remarked, "Well, I never really liked vegetables, and now that Mom's not here to make me eat them, I don't have to. Bring on the burgers and fries, am I right?"

Participant D: The Basketball Player Who Now Dribbles Only His Food

The slam dunks and three-pointers of his high school days were a distant memory as this former basketball star navigated through college. With a 40-pound weight gain, his vertical leap was now limited to reaching for the top shelf of the pantry. When asked about his lifestyle changes, he offered this brilliant insight: "I mean, there's just so much good food around, and parties, and stuff. Why waste time playing ball when you can eat and chill, ya know?"

Participant E: The Swimmer Whose Pool Now Holds Only Chips and Dip

Once a lean, mean swimming machine, this participant found that the "freshman 15" was more like the "freshman 45" for him. His once-aerodynamic physique was now more suited for floating than swimming. In an attempt to justify his new lifestyle, he explained, "Dude, I swam, like, all the time in high school. Now, it's just nice to, like, not have to do that anymore, you know?"

Discussion:

The interviews and weigh-ins revealed a clear trend: high school athleticism did not guarantee continued fitness in college. Several factors contributed to the transformation from "jocks" to "blocks," including a lack of structured exercise, increased social commitments, and new dietary habits. However, we must also acknowledge the role of the college environment itself.

Colleges often provide students with numerous options for unhealthy food, and social events can lead to excessive drinking and late-night binge eating. Our former athletes, now unshackled from the rigors of high school sports, found themselves ill-prepared for managing their health in this new environment. It is clear that this issue extends beyond individual choices and requires systemic changes to promote a healthier college experience.

The interviews also revealed a pattern of participants downplaying the significance of their weight gain and the impact on their health. This laissez-faire attitude suggests that education on the importance of maintaining a healthy lifestyle during college is necessary to prevent obesity and its associated health risks.

Conclusion:

The road from high school athletic success to college obesity is paved with good intentions, but often marred by a lack of guidance and support. It is crucial to address the root causes of obesity among college students, especially those who were once models of physical fitness. By providing resources, education, and opportunities for continued physical activity, colleges and universities can help these students maintain their health and well-being, and perhaps even restore their former glory (yeah, right).

The irony of these once-athletic young men now struggling with obesity highlights the need for a comprehensive approach to health and wellness during the college years. It is our hope that this study sheds light on the importance of addressing the unique challenges faced by former high school athletes as they transition to college life. With appropriate interventions and support, perhaps these young men can once again become role models for physical fitness and healthy living. But that doesn't look very likely.

[wheneclipsefalls]

Could you maybe tells us about the withered one shot? I haven’t seen anyone request to talk about it

Of course!

I actually have written and rewritten certain scenes from this one shot since the first time I tried writing it...it just didn't feel right. So I started over. Second time around I am feeling a lot better about it. I just love this pair so much and love how the original turned out so it's important to me that this one especially is written well.

The one shot is about Neteyam's rut and how that couple deals with it when it comes up unexpectedly. Reader is a lot less experienced that Neteyam so you get to see his hesitation and concern for her but also....things get turned up and we see a different side of this Neteyam;)

Here's a little teaser for you<3

WITHERED ONE SHOT TEASER (unedited)

He’s a coward. 

A downright skxawng with the planning skills of a young child. 

This Neteyam is sure of as he dunks underneath the cool river for the fifth time. Only a few nights ago this water was cold enough to have his mate taunting him for wading in slowly. Now it is inadequate in cooling down his heated skin. A fire that burns without respite until sweat is beading over his brow. 

Neteyam’s rut isn’t originally due for another two months. Two months that would allow him the time and patience to ease you into this new dynamic of your relationship. His sweet tanhi whose experience with alpha males stops at her interactions with them during nightly hunts. His innocent little star who just barely gave over her virginity to him no more than a moon cycle ago. 

To him. Only to him. This thought sends a shot of heat to his pelvis and Neteyam hates himself for it. Hates the way his inner alpha perks up and revels in that fact, reminding him over and over that he was the one to claim your innocence. That only his hands would know the shape of your body. That only his cock has ever been buried in your sweet heat. And your body only knows him.

A little star only he has had the privilege of plucking from the sky. 

His temple rests against the thick rooted tree as he wrestles the restrictive loincloth away and harshly grips the base of his cock. It pulses in his grip, a bead of precum already dripping from the tip into the water below. The last thing he should be thinking about is the way your small hands would wrap around his length softer, timid strokes bringing his pleasure to new heights.

He’s left you alone with Kiri, and ran to the hills after Lo’ak’s warning like a coward. You are sure to be looking for him, prancing from tree to tree until you can find your skxawng of a mate and question him for the inappropriate behavior displayed tonight. 

And yet, the idea of you looking for him only heightens a primal desire from deep within him. His lovely little mate looking for her alpha. Would you be embarrassed at the sight of his arousal, hand gripping and tugging at his length with no shame? He can see it now, those doe eyes widening accompanied with a blossoming tint over your cheeks. The same eyes that were clouded with unshed tears as his cock slowly pistoned into your mouth for the first time last week. 

Oh Eywa, what he wouldn’t give to see the sight of you on your knees taking his length again. The string of saliva that had been a bridge between your swollen lips and his dripping tip, just before you tiredly smiled up at him in search of approval. 

His spins on his heel, head tipped back against the tree as his hand furiously increases its harsh pace. It’s borderline humiliating to feel his climax approaching so quickly, and yet it would be the first of many that only leave him breathless and aching for more. There is truly only one cure for this condition. Only one person that can give him the sweet release he craves. 

Chest heaving and fingers spazzing around his length, Neteyam just barely catches the sound of water rippling. Immediately he yanks his hand away and turns to face the oncomer.

“I thought you said this water was too cold last night.” You snicker, fingers already working to undo the knots of your tewng as you slowly wade in. “I know Lo’ak poked some fun at your need to bathe earlier, but you could’ve at least waited for me.” Your eyes narrow and nose scrunch in a reprimanding expression but there is no true ire there. Only a glimmer of playful excitement that is easily perceivable with your swishing tail. 

By Eywa. 

He is done for. 

There's a little taste. Let me know what y'all think so far<3

[scrumptiousstuffs]

yknow what i want for fk? more shows. PUT THEM IN INSANE HET SHOWS I BEG 😭 no more one bl a year i need them in a show in every part gmmtv announces shows in. i would literally pay for home school 2 for insane khao. i would pay gmmtv for insane first in a show. LET THEM PLAY INSANE CHARACTERS. FOR MY MENTAL HEALTH.

gmmtv's het shows are so underrated because those things are way more unabashedly queer even compared to a lot of bl's they produce <- preaching like im from the missionary of 'gmmtv het show are gay af' alliance

(i just love the het shows and will take any moment to talk about it. like yea ofc theres stupid ones but some of them are just so fucking good and made with so much love and passion and its so visible and it makes me so soft 🥺)

- burnsuncomet (they should really let me ask stuff from my sideblog smh 😔)

Go on. Tell me more about what het shows you like from GMMTV (and why you like them). And tell me what ideas do you want for your het shows for FK?

I personally enjoyed Home School (so I am definitely on board with Khaotung versus Gun for season 2!) , Midnight Museum, Enigma (for a horror show, this pack a lot more than just good special effects) and the currently airing Peaceful Property (which we are still debating whether it’s BL or not 😂).

And I cannot stress enough how much 55:15 Never Too Late is such an underrated gem (yes it has a side BL featuring our own Khaotung who nailed his role as SongPol/Paul) but my other fav storyline in that show was View’s character and the friendship between Paul and Piploy’s character.

I didn’t mind Summer nights but I got terribly bored by Phuwin (and whoever his love interest was) - and really just perked up when Dunk’s character White and Lookjun interacted.

And if you are asking me what het shows I’m looking forward from GMMTV - Hide & Sis (it has Jan, Piploy and Lookjun plus Chimon playing a sleaze ball? - sign me up!)

But I’m digressing - we are talking about FK hehe. I admit I was disappointed when they only have one project for 2024, which has yet to air 🥲 (especially after getting spoilt with 3 shows from them in 2023 😩).

I think FK is under utilised by GMMTV (but then again, don’t we all say the same when talking about our own bias CPs?) - I want them to be in reality show, talk shows, V-log ANYTHING really beyond just one BL cause they have so much potential (we are definitely in agreement with this. Although it’s of course not feasible to have everything for the boys cause they will burnout otherwise 🙂‍↕️). But we can all dream yeah?

Anyway, I thought this user from Twitter has the cutest idea ever for their YT content 👇🏽 (credit on the screenshot)

(Or I take the boys going camping together with us watching them cook and playing guitar and toasting marshmallows by the campsite)

In my alternate reality where FK gets to act more than one BL per year, these are my pick for hetero show/concept with FK in it:

The currently aired “The Judge from Hell”, k-drama starring Park Shin Hye and Kim Jae Young. I want a Thai remake - with Piploy as the devil in the judge’s body (she plays beautiful evil/anti-hero well! - her performance in Enigma was a good example of this) and First as our dutiful cop who joined force (literally selling his soul) to the devil after his mother figure got killed by a serial killer who also killed his birth parents. We know First can play tortured and devastation well, but truly seeing him fight to keep his morality? - 🤌 (also First already looks like a Korean movie star, so he will fit in well! Plus not going to lie - a tall First having to lean down on tiny Piploy while they bicker and fall in love 🤭 (these 2 have quite the chemistry in The Shipper)

As for Khaotung (we already mentioned Home School), but if I want to see him in a hetero couple - it will be with Ciize. These 2 were wholesome together in Tonhon Chonlatee (the show has flaws, but I still enjoyed it and Khaotung/Ciize being besties in that show was one of the highlights for me!)

And again, I’m borrowing this from one of my favourite k-drama, Happiness (2021) featuring Park Hyung-Sik and Han Hyo-Joo. Beyond just a zombie flick, it’s a commentary on social class but also the desperation and the length people go to when trapped with no where to go. Also, I won’t lie, I just want to see Khaotung (now that he is so buff!) and Ciize (despite her tiny frame) being badass with guns- it also has a sweet romance line between the main characters 😂

And bonus - if I can make my own FK-centric drama:

I want them to play cross-lovers in the past but one of them was a woman.

They both reincarnated - the woman’s soul now in one of the boys (I haven’t quite figure out who I want to play this role between them 🤣). This soul remembers his previous life and lover but avoids trying to look for him (cause you know, she is now a he and thought his previous lover is straight)

While the other person - knows he is missing someone, he has a deep yearning for this one person. However, he can’t remember the face or really anything beyond vague flashbacks except he knows it is a she. So he keeps looking at girls of course not finding the one. Meanwhile, fate (of course) made them meet and they keep avoiding trying to not fall in love but fail 🤷🏽‍♀️. I have even thought of what jobs these boys could have, the side characters 🤣…but alas, this will stay in delulu land (and yes, if you think the plot sounds vaguely familiar, it likely is! Cause I just pick all the plots/tropes I like and meshed it up!)

[nyxnoir1337]

Random 3 am thoughts

Fox was the most decorated clone on Kamino. with the highest performance scores. Do you think people occasionally forget this as most see the as glorified pemail pushers or flimsi I believe in Star wars. Like shinies and frontliners will come to Couresant for leave or to join the guard and their just casually cruising through the layers on their way to 79's or something when all of a sudden a gang of crooks is seen trying to run away from a crime. Then suddenly, a guard drops out of the sky and tackles one of them quickly, knocking them out before engaging the rest of them. One tries to flee as the lone guard is seen mopping the floor with the rest of the cronies when, without sparing more than a glance, nails the runner with a stun shot in between knocking out another goon. More guards begin to arrive and begin cuffing the criminals with the first one going to retrieve the tall kriffer with golden markings who tried to make a name for it. The guard l ooks up and makes eyecontact with the spectators. He briefly nods his head out, then before throwing the kriffer with dreads over his shoulders to take him to the dunk tanks. Nobody believes then when they fall the story at the bar that the grand are crazy nutters who take things like stairs and doors as suggestions when in pursuit. They did it so silently as well. The others laughed then off but the watchers recmembered that fox cars trained with the likes of commander Cody and wolffe and tell themselves to tread carefully on courasont from noone on lest they be the next ones hunted down.

I still think the guard moves like batman and his and extended partners through the planet wide city. Busting in through Skylights traveling in the Shadows the whole Shebang.

[jonsnowunemploymentera]

Hello! So i know that I am WAY! less knowleged than u re: asiof but I have a question about the Prophecy (AA/PTWP). I did a deep dive on it and GRRM spoke repeately about handling prophecy carefully/not too literally etc 3 weeks ago at Oxford he repeated: "you cannot have a prophecy that comes true way it was written and everbody understands it(..) it has to come true in a way you didnt understand(..)so it bites you in the ass" So rather than "who has the most obvious PTWP clues" shouldnt we theorize "how will the idea of AA/PTWP backfire on the believers" or "how can a unique/unpreditable element fill the role"? Since Im assuming GRRM stance will likely apply to the biggest prophecy in the books. What do you think? do you know theories like that? If anything, I only see "the prophecy is just nonsense!!" but that is clearly also not what GRRM says: not prophecy is bogus but has to be unexpected or "bite you in the ass".

Hey! No, you're far too kind 😭

I completely agree with you, and you raise some interesting and important questions, especially when considering how these ideas reflect back on our protagonists.

The tricky thing with interpreting prophecy is that the characters are operating on second-hand, third-hand, or even more distant accounts, all filtered through their cultural understandings of what a hero should be. Their beliefs are shaped by the information available to them, which is often incomplete or distorted. This means each character's idea of who is the subject of prophecy is largely subjective, influenced by their biases and specific cultural narratives and thus might never present the whole truth! So as readers, we should be very cautious about how we interpret the declarations presented by any character as absolute truth. We will probably never know until the final book is published, and even then it might be murky at best.

I saw GRRM’s comments a few days ago, and they really resonated with me because they align with how I’ve been feeling lately, particularly regarding Melisandre's role in all of this:

“[…] It is written in prophecy as well. When the red star bleeds and the darkness gathers, Azor Ahai shall be born again amidst smoke and salt to wake dragons out of stone.” (Davos III, ASoS)

It's often amusing in fandom to discuss how wrong Melisandre is, and she certainly is almost all the time. But lately, I've been wondering: what if we're wrong too? We focus so much on Melisandre misidentifying Azor Ahai, but what if she completely misunderstands her own role in all of this—and we're too blinded to notice it?

Because the issue isn't just that she's chosen the wrong person. The bigger problem is that she's fixated on providing what she believes are the necessary tools to defeat the Others. She wants to "wake dragons out of stone”, repeatedly asserting that "two kings" are needed to wake the dragon so they can serve Stannis Baratheon. This thinking leads to the burning of Shireen—because someone must die to forge the hero's weapon. Melisandre even sees herself as expendable in this grand scheme. But what if her entire understanding is flawed—not just about who the hero is, but about the very dragon she is trying to awaken?

I've been considering all this because "dragons" in the text don’t always refer to actual winged creatures—they're often symbolic descriptors for Targaryens in visions. For example, Moqorro's visions show dragons old and young, true and false; Baelor Breakspear appears as a dragon falling on top of Dunk; and a dragon egg hatching essentially symbolizes Aegon V. So if we're taking prophecy at face value, just as Mel does, we're left wondering where in seven hells she expects to find her "sleeping dragons".

But the thing is, she already has one: Jon Snow. In fact, her visions in Dance suggest that Jon is the one she is truly searching for. And I often think of these visions as moments where I go, "Oh, come on, Mel! It's not that guy; it's the other one!" Yet I've come to realize that even if she identifies Jon correctly, Mel would still face the dilemma of needing another sacrifice to "wake" Jon's dragon. However, she is likely to resurrect Jon before reconnecting with Stannis, which means that by the time she and Stannis consider burning Shireen, she may have already awakened the dragon - and thus fulfilled the prophecy.

If Jon is the awakened dragon, that adds a tragic irony to the whole situation with Mel and Shireen. Legend has it that the woman (Nissa Nissa) dies for the hero’s glory. But if Jon is the dragon, then does that make Melisandre Azor Ahai in this case? After all, we don't know much about the original prophecy so who knows how much it has been distorted over time?

But wouldn't that be such a twist? Mel isn’t a noble lady or royal; she's a former slave, a mere priestess—a tool, a guide, but not the hero. She never considered that she, a woman, could be R’hllor’s chosen. Yet she would perform an actual miracle in bringing a dragon back to life. And if, like me, you believe that Jon will be born from a funeral pyre (inverting Khal Drogo and Dany's dragon eggs), then the prophecy is turned entirely on its head.

This also raises the question: what about Shireen? What does she, an innocent little girl, die for? Why should she have to die for a dragon that is already living? Why should she have to die to exalt a false hero, when the true miracle worker is actually the "expendable" woman who stands before her? Then we have Melisandre carry the baggage of killing a child for something she had successfully completed before...It doesn't matter if she's able to perform some bastardized miracle and create a shadow dragon, because it would all be all for naught and a wasted effort. To me, this is more satisfying from a character development perspective because Melisandre is no longer a background character. She’s got POV chapters now, which means she has an arc that needs to reach its natural conclusion. It cannot begin and end in service of the men around her. She must reflect on her role and come to terms with her actions—both good (waking the dragon in Jon) and bad (sacrificing Shireen for something she had already accomplished and for a prophecy she had already fulfilled); and this could lead to some compelling writing. This might also answer your question about "how will the idea of AA/PTWP backfire on the believers?”. Because “incorrect” interpretations not only hinder progress, but the cost of human life is perhaps too high :/

Oops, so sorry for the long tangent.....

[icyg4l]

PAC: How Can I Be More Connected to My Community? (LGBTQ+ EDITION)

Hello all! In this week’s edition of the Women’s History Month tarot series, I have decided to add a more specifically inclusive topic to this series. I will be reading on how you can develop more connections with women in your community. 🫶 Using my LGBTQ+ tarot deck, I will get to the bottom of this. Without further ado, pick your pile.

***Disclaimer: The purpose of this reading is to help women/femmes connect with other women/femmes! Much love. 🫶

Left-to-Right (1-6):

Pile One: Pile One, I feel like you have some issues with women in general. This is what a sociologist would call internalized misogyny. Every woman goes through this at some point but I am picking up on bisexual femme/*general* lesbian energy. This is what is keeping you from being in close company with other women. How are you going to be distrusting of women if this is what you are trying to attract? Whether romantically or platonically, I feel like you need to open up your world a bit. I feel like you can be particularly distrusting of women who mirror your energy, which is ironic. There is some shadow work that must be done for self-forgiveness. You have not forgiven yourself for something that could have happened at work or school? Some type of situationship perhaps. Or maybe you have the tendency to get into crash-and-burn type of relationships, which explains your lack of trust. Learn how to take things easy and slowly; lean into those gut feelings. The type of women you will attract in your circle/community will be women that aren’t afraid to apologize and take accountability. You need people around you that are going to be there for you when you fall. I get the feeling that the people attracted to this are people who are on medication. A bonus tip: Take your medication please! (this is coming from someone who has to do so as well). You need to be around people that will ground you and make sure that you aren’t too imbalanced. I pulled some Rebel Deck Oracle cards for you and this is what your community would say to you:

“Fuck fear.”

“You are going through some tough shit.”

“You need a good fucking cry.”

“You need some fucking yoga in your life.”

Cards Used: The Star (RX), Knight of Wands, The World, Four of Wands, Ten of Pentacles, Temperance, Ten of Swords, Three of Pentacles, Ace of Wands, The High Priestess, The Empress, Two of Wands, Five of Swords and Nine of Pentacles (RX).

extras: mommy issues. being the wild card. “gone with the wind.” melanie martinez. aries. bryson tiller. makeup forever. yo perreo sola by bad bunny. rue bennett. BPD. card games. playful energy. “likewise.” roaches/blunts. twitter fingers. snapbacks. jordan dunks. cheeky underwear.

Pile Two: Pile Two, your message is similar to Pile One’s. I feel you need to stop being so male-centered or heteronormative. You could be agender but have a partner who falls into the binary, and this make you feel conflicted on what gender roles you should take on. You could be a lesbian who looks for a specific woman to play the “man” or the “woman” in the relationship. You could be a transwoman who is hyperfixated on not being clocked. You could identify as bisexual but have a cishet partner, and because of this, you feel fraudulent. If you fit into any of these categories, I feel like the main thing you need to know is you shouldn’t beat yourself up for being bold enough to express yourself the way you want to. You should, however, examine the relationship that you have with men/masculine. Whether you like it or not, you’re holding yourself to a standard that a man created and therefore, you are playing into misogyny. You are defying the odds in some way, shape or form and it has been done for years. Stop putting the people who oppress you on a pedestal. I feel like you’ve been around too many straight/cis-heterosexual people or internalize their ideas. The first step is to grieve your old self. You need to step into the version of yourself that is forward-thinking and pioneering. This can be a lonely road to take but it’s going to help you get to the people that you seek. You’re supposed to be around people who protest; strong, independent thinkers who do not take no for an answer. Reintroduce yourself to the world, Pile Two and great people will await you. I pulled some Rebel Deck Oracle cards for you and this is what your community would say to you:

“You got a feeling you just can’t shake.”

“It’s dark and you can’t see a fucking thing.”

“Get over yourself. Pull your shit together.”

You need a good fucking cry.”

“Put the fucking phone down”

Cards Used: Eight of Swords, Four of Swords, Nine of Wands, Ten of Pentacles, Four of Wands (RX), King of Wands (RX), Ten of Pentacles, Queen of Swords, Three of Pentacles, Queen of Wands, Four of Cups, Five of Cups, Ace of Wands.

extras: but i’m a cheerleader. “Dani”. can’t back down by camp rock cast. leather boots. lots of rings. chunky highlights. recently got a car wash. need for pampering. long legs. stylish. fringe. long eyelashes. brimmed coats. new york. miami. LA. colored eyes. flashy jewelry. the color gold. pigs.

Pile Three: Pile Three, you honestly could just keep doing you. I feel like people are naturally drawn to you. Your energy reminds me of my friend who is friends with other gay women and she’s so likable. You could honestly vibe with anyone. You could fall in any LGBTQ category, but you have a big heart. I’m not going to lie though, Pile Three, you can come on too hard with some people; especially those who are on the shy side. So, calm it downnnn just a bit. People appreciate your community organizing efforts though. I feel like you’re known in your local community just for being friendly, helpful and wanting better for the LGBTQ+ community. This is something you take pride in. I feel like something that you can do to attract more LGBTQ+ women in your life is to actually do the opposite of Pile One. I feel like you tend to draw in all types of people, so you have the tendency to be disappointed by people’s actions. Be more protective of your energy and you’ll attract more community members like yourself. People who have ideas that are as big as yours. People who want to change the world. People who want to leave behind old traditions. People who have dreams that they actively pursue. Your energy is just so precious and bright, Pile Three. You really need to be careful. I pulled some Rebel Deck Oracle cards for you and this is what your community would say to you:

“Stop talking.”

“It’s dark and you can’t see a fucking thing”

“Rebel”

Cards Used: Knight of Swords, Justice (RX), King of Wands, The Moon, Page of Pentacles, Four of Cups (RX), The Star, Seven of Wands, Three of Swords, Page of Swords, The Hermit, King of Pentacles, Three of Cups, The Sun, Eight of Cups, The Hanged Man, Page of Cups.

extras: stripes. fruit lover. small hoops. glasses. checklist. virgos. the color blue. mondays. morning people. cash register. mom friend. goofball. nice smile. shoulder length hair. bright pajamas. trans right advocate.

Pile Four: Pile Four, you’re like really smart and confident. This could rub people the wrong way though. I feel like your energy is only for certain people, you’re not everyone’s cup of tea. I think that you were probably born in the wrong state or town. You probably are the only queer/trans person in town when you’re supposed to be in a place like Dallas, California or Atlanta. Relocation is the move for you definitely. I get this sense that you’re the token gay friend. The energy feels awkward. I feel like where you’re right now is for school and you’re just trying to stick it out for now. But if you are able to move, please do so. If you cannot though, the steps that you need to take toward having more community is pushing past the people that you encounter on a daily basis. You aren’t looking hard enough for your types of people. You keep circling the same places instead of trying out that new activity. The old fashioned way of seeking community is out! Perhaps, you should download Tinder or actually go to that event at school. If all else fails, you should start a club for LGBTQ+ students and see who shows up. You will know that you’ve found your people by looking outside the box; the outcasts; the quiet people; the loners. I pulled some Rebel Deck Oracle cards for you and this is what your community would say to you:

“Laugh”

“Eat your fucking vegetables”

“Rebel”

Cards Used: Strength, Eight of Cups (RX), King of Cups, Two of Swords, Six of Wands, Knight of Pentacles, Seven of Swords, Eight of Pentacles, Four of Cups, Justice, Seven of Pentacles, The High Priestess, The Lovers (RX), The Emperor.

extras: scorpio energy. pasta and lobster. aquarius. rap music. banana. artsy. theater kid. biracial. young thug. “cordial.” patience is key. “get lost.” bree runway.

Pile Five: Pile Five, you’re quite the mysterious one, aren’t you? Your energy feels so discreet. I feel like you’ve done the work to be perceived as more approachable but you still feel a little empty. I think you need to take a vacation. You work so hard, maybe a little too hard. This will be where you find your *gay* people. The feeling of being burned out comes to mind. It feels like you’re a loner. Maybe you’re Pile Four’s type of people lol. You need to be refreshed. I think you actually need to go outside. Soak in the sun, go to the beach, the park, somewhere outdoors. It feels like you don’t have people around you. You’re isolated. You stay to yourself but doesn’t that get lonely, Pile Five? I would also say consider making long distance friends or internet friends who are a part of the LGBTQ+ community in order to combat this loneliness. I also would say that you need to put in more effort to maintain these friendships as well. The types of people that you will be attracting are the genuine friendships where you go bar hopping with them. You need people around who are going to keep you light on your feet and entertain you with the latest news about how Gay #1 is secretly in love with Bisexual #2. I pulled some Rebel Deck Oracle cards for you and this is what your community would say to you:

“Take a fucking trip”

“You are talented and fucking amazing”

“Shit is going down with your job”

Cards Used: Six of Swords, The Empress, The Magician, The Hanged Man, Judgment, Queen of Wands, Justice, The World, The Star, Death, Ace of Swords, Three of Cups, King of Swords, Two of Swords.

extras: “quiet as a church mouse.” purple. wigs. red nails. “you’re so dry.” day-by-day. bad at texting. celebrity gossip. spirituality. meditation.

Pile Six: Pile Six, you’re so scandalous lmao. I don’t want to be the one to say this but you need to stop sleeping and/or flirting with women’s partners. It scares off potential friends and it causes people to not trust you. Another thing you need to stop doing is kissing your friends. You need to draw some lines between platonic and romantic relationships. And if you are polyamorous, your favorites are starting to show; show love equally or expect a mess to blow up in your face. You need to expand outward, Pile Six. I know people are making a spectacle of your love life and you don’t understand why but remember this: Every habit that you have is connected to how you treat others. People take notice of this. You moved like you’re in a small room, dear. You need to expand! Expand your circle of lovers; stop messing with people in the smalltown that you’re in when you should be with someone in the city. Instead of taking offense to other people’s words, you should be doing some self-introspection. Why do you do the things that you do? Is it for attention? Out of boredom? Out of desperation? For revenge? You should take up a hobby and find a new passion. This may be where you find your people. I think that being around people who are older/more mature than you would benefit you. You need to be around a community of people who are mothers/act like mothers. They have stories to tell and you will gain knowledge from them. You will feel understood. They won’t judge you ‘cause they’ve been there. I pulled some Rebel Deck Oracle cards for you and this is what your community would say to you:

“You are going through some tough shit”

“You = Tight ass”

“Fuck fear”

“They broke your heart”

Cards Used: Temperance (RX), Judgment (RX), The Magician, The Star, Queen of Wands, Five of Cups, Nine of Swords, Four of Pentacles, Nine of Pentacles, Three of Wands, Page of Swords (RX), The Messenger (Hierophant), Eight of Pentacles, Knight of Wands (RX).

extras: pisces. cuticles. cucumbers. questioning. dominance. foreplay. sexual education. “you clean up nice.” fake drunk. long dresses. cocoa brown complexion.

[genericpuff]

maybe this is just me being cynical of webtoon readers but i need to say that some of them really are that dumb and lacking media literacy that i can in total honesty say they would have screamed in the comment section about perse being dead - not LO readers specifically actually, but the top comments i see on some other webtoons.. phew. In some webtoons it is also made very clearly and explicitly by the creator that X is happening and then i scroll to the comment section and people are all asking 'wait is it just me or might X be happening???' 'omg guys i have a theory that X is happening'. And while that's frustrating the way RS tried to pre-emptively avoid that is honestly so hilarious to me, i am just in awe of it. It immediately undercuts all the tension of how the chapter ended and yes it's condescending as hell but it's sadly a sentiment i actually understand (tho i never would have actually done it that way.. like i think if she really wanted to make that author's note, maybe write it in a comment IF seeing there really was confusion among readers) but that chapter ending is just peak comedy to me, 5 out of 5 stars, no notes.

yeeah i don't wanna be a dick to the kids who are reading these comics and just having fun in their respective fandoms, but i've also made it a general rule of thumb to stay the HELL out of the webtoon comment sections because they're a whole other level of unhinged that i don't wanna touch with a ten foot pole LMAO

an LO-specific example that was so freaking hilarious to me wasn't even in the webtoon comment section but had the same vibe - someone in the main subreddit (the one that's closed now) asking in the season 2 finale discussion thread, "wait when did persephone eat the pomegranate???" like. that was literally the cliffhanger from the week before my guy. as much as i dunk on rachel's work for being visibly rushed, it's gotta suck to put in all the effort it takes to release comic episodes on a weekly basis just for your fans to not even stop and look at the art you've created. like damn it's no wonder the fans don't notice the glaring plotholes going on in the writing, they aren't actually reading it TT-TT idk if the way these communities engage with these comics is the cause of this, but it definitely makes it feel like some of these comics are being written like buzzfeed articles whose only goal is being as 'consumable' as possible without any actual depth, just "keep people fastpassing". which they absolutely do u.u

[butterflydm]

cr3 102

I really enjoyed Bells Hells' questioning of Ludinus. I think they hit pretty much every point that I would have wanted them to make (even with them being less sympathetic towards the exandria gods than I am) and the way that Ludinus dodged every single question that they tried to put to him was... definitely less than convincing. And the way he left (encouraging the unleashing of Delilah) seems likely to only sour them even more towards him.

Because the huge point that needs to be made is that even if Ludinus was 100% correct about the gods -- even if that were true... how is what he's proposing any better? And he doesn't have any answer apart from "trust me bro".

Why is his super-powerful entity from beyond the stars better than the prime gods? It's just that it's his super-powerful entity that he prays to and communes with and devotes his life to empowering, and so that makes it different (and definitely not at all his god lol).

Launda being the one to point out how the prime/betrayer gods are a messed up little family just like Bells Hells is a messed up little family feels very poignant given the circumstances. And it tied really well into Launda very much fighting Delilah and giving her family permission to take her down to take down Delilah, which really made me feel like Laundra was paying real close attention to the interactions between the gods and she is determined not to be a 'betrayer god' to her own family.

Very emotionally intense fight overall but with some great moments of humor too (Essek the goat!). Launda fighting her way out of Delilah was fantastic every time. And Imogen (and the others!) trying to reach her.

I know that Orym has had more interactions with the Wildmother than any other god, but I am really feeling the Dawnfather energy from him tonight -- fighting but always hoping for another way out. At one hit point, staying in the fight and doing everything in his power to do his part for his family -- feels very much like Ayden/Dawnfather taking all that damage for the Emissary in the fight last episode. (and that's just the way that Orym is but, you know, that only reinforces the vibe)

(but, yeah, "She's hurt us worse than anyone." "That's why we have to help her." just... big Asmodeus-Everlight-Dawnfather vibes)

Dorian darting over to Orym after seeing him fall twice and trying to get him out of danger and just worrying over him the whole time. Lots of Dorym & Crownkeeper emotions going on tonight. And some tension, too! Because Dorian is more anti-god than anyone else at the table (due to what happened with Opal, I assume).

Was that Ashton leaving a piece of FCG in Aeor? Oh, man, my heart. There is also even more self-hate going on there than I realized, given the logic train of "if the gods are like us, they probably do deserve to die".

Braius is hilarious and I do not trust him even the slightest bit. And sorta bonding with Fearne over how all the gods are family (even the betrayers - so yeah that's an interesting vibe to be bringing in).

And we have a way to maybe separate Delilah from Launda, which is very exciting!

Yeah, this was a fantastic episode. We got everyone dunking on Ludinus, we got a tense fight, and we got to deal with the aftermath of the pvp in some safety and comfort afterwards. It had it all!

[niki-phoria]

hi! i have a request for jay or sunghoon:)

i was thinking of a high school au where one of the boys are in the basketball team for their school. they have a rival school and jay/hoon also have a rival component (it can be someone from enha or txt) and they both want y/n🤭🤭 y/n can be close to both of them since they’re a reporter for their high school and have followed all their games since they report them

so basically i was thinking it ends where like jay/hoon win the game and they get the courage to confess from the rush of winning<3

just an idea i got, btw i loooove ur fics 😭😭

blonde mullet hoon >>>

pairing: basketball player!sunghoon x school reporter!gn!reader (they/them pronouns used) genre: fluff word count: 1.7k

includes: high school au, poor basketball knowledge, i forgot what a dunk was and spent like five minutes googling it (is it even a dunk ??), blushy hoon, enha teasing hoon, txt cameos, chose beomgyu as hoon's rival but it's a good rivalry like they're friends they just play for different schools yk

a/n: choosing hoon for this bc this man will not let me live in peace /lh thank you so much for requesting !! it means so much that you enjoy my writing <33 this was such a cute idea, i hope you enjoy it :))

additional note: i used to be part of the yearbook club for a few years so i had to take pics of volleyball games so i have a little bit of experience with this i am aware that you don't scroll through cameras but i couldn't think of another word for it okay

requests open !! read my rules first

the referee blowing the whistle is your cue to prepare to start taking more pictures. you keep the camera close to your face, snapping multiple pictures at a time. beomgyu dribbles the ball, effortlessly guiding it along the floor as he runs to the other side of the court. he jumps, grabbing onto the rim and forcing it down through the net. 

cheers erupt from the crowd behind you. you continue on, photographing his team rushing to where he is. they wrap their arms around each other, jumping in celebration. a small smile spreads across your face at the joy that radiates from all of them. 

nearby, sunghoon sighs, leaning down on his hands. though his team lost the point, that’s not the reason why his lips quirk downwards into a slight frown. he leans forwards onto his hands, subtly looking at you through his fringe. 

“it’s okay hyung,” sunoo says, patting his shoulder. he drops his voice, leaning in as if they’re strategizing. “talk to them after they finish. you know they always make time for you.” 

sunghoon hopes the audience assumes his flushed face is from the game. their cheers quiet down when the referee blows the whistle again, announcing another round. sunoo squeezes his shoulder before he makes his way back to his own position. 

sunghoon glances over at you again. this time you notice him, smiling and raising your fist in a small ‘fighting!’ gesture. he nods, leaning back onto his knees. he takes a deep breath, letting himself refocus completely on the game. everything else seems to fade away - the audience cheers, his coach yelling, the pressure from everywhere around him, even you and how nervous you make him. he lets the tension relax from his shoulders. 

he isn’t park sunghoon, star basketball player constantly pinned against choi beomgyu who needs to live up to his reputation. he’s a teenage boy playing the sport he fell in love with secretly hoping it impresses the cute reporter standing at the other end of the court. 

“sunghoon!” the ball feels light in his hands as jungwon passes it over. he dodges kai’s blocking attempt, running past yeonjun and taehyun as he jumps, shooting for the hoop. he scores. 

the audience all but explodes. elation spreads through him as he pants. the referee holds her hands up, announcing their win. beside him, beomgyu holds out a hand. “congratulations,” he smiles.

sunghoon takes it, letting beomgyu pull him into a quick hug. “you too.” he quickly bows at soobin before his team swarms him, all of them trapped in a giant group hug. he laughs as they repeatedly pat his back and shoulders. 

“good job everyone,” jungwon pants. “we all did well.” 

“let’s get cleaned up,” heeseung smiles. “we could all use a shower.” 

sunghoon looks over his shoulder to where you’re standing. beomgyu is leaning down to look at your camera as you scroll through the various photos you’ve taken during the night. little pangs of jealousy sting him. “i’ll be right there.” 

he ignores the teasing “good luck” from jay, pushing his hair back as he makes his way over to you and beomgyu. beomgyu notices him first. “hey sunghoon.” 

“hi hoon!” you perk up immediately, stepping towards him to wrap him into a hug. he wraps his arms around you, relishing in your touch. your actions ease some of the jealousy that still lingers. “great job out there today! you were incredible!” 

sunghoon laughs, shaking his head. “thank you.” 

“i was just showing beomgyu some of the photos from tonight, do you want to see?” he glances over at said boy, a silent question passing between them. 

“you go ahead, i should get cleaned up anyways,” beomgyu smiles. “besides, it’ll be a long bus ride back home.” 

“i’ll see you later, gyu,” you call as he leaves. 

“see you hyung.” beomgyu gives him a small wink before he exits the gym. 

now mostly alone with you, sunghoon leans over your shoulder as you scroll back through the variety of pictures from the night. he can recognize some of the moments from them - beomgyu’s dunk, him leaning down on his knees, his winning shot, beomgyu’s high five, and his team celebrating. 

“i was thinking of using this one,” you murmur, moving back to a specific photo. it’s of sunghoon in mid-air during the winning shot of the night. even he has to admit that he looks good in the shot, even without editing. “mrs. lee wants the headline piece to be about the game tonight. i was hoping you could help me with basketball terms.” 

“of course,” sunghoon smiles. he hadn’t realized how close you’re standing until you look over your shoulder at him. your back is nearly against his chest. he blushes, refocusing back on the camera in your hands. it feels intimate but neither of you move away. he clears his throat a little awkwardly. “are you coming to the game tomorrow night?” 

“looks like it,” you sigh. “mrs. lee wants to assign me to sports.” 

“and that’s… bad?” despite your disappointment at the idea, a small part of him is excited at the possibility of being able to spend more time with you. 

“just not a huge fan of the screaming,” you shrug. “at least i’ll have you with me.” 

sunghoon can’t help the smile that spreads across his face. he’s grateful that you don’t comment on how quickly his ears redden, though he’s sure you can tell. “yeah?” 

“yeah,” you smile. “you make everything better.” 

he’s saved from the embarrassment of his blush deepening further when the door swings open. “sunghoon,” his coach calls. “the showers are open if you’re ready.” 

“yeah, yeah,” he nods before turning back to you. “so, i’ll see you tomorrow?” 

“you’ll see me tomorrow,” you confirm.

the giddiness builds in sunghoon as he leaves for the showers, letting the cool water calm him down. he washes up quickly, rinsing the sweat from his body and hair before throwing on an old pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt he brought with him. 

niki, jake, heeseung, and jungwon have already finished showering when he exits, rummaging through his bag to put his uniform away. “that was an awfully long talk with y/n,” niki says. “did you finally do it?” 

sunghoon purses his lips, pretending to continue looking for something in his bag. “no.” 

jake sits up, looking over at him. “really? you should. it’s really obvious they like you.” 

“sunoo said that too,” he sighs, sitting down on the bench next to them. “do you really think so?” 

“like jake said, it’s pretty obvious.” heeseung chuckles. “they flirt with you pretty much every time you guys interact.” 

this makes him pause, looking over at his friends. “do you think they know i like them?” 

“you look like a lovesick fool whenever they glance in your direction,” niki laughs. “i’m sure they know already.” 

“ah,” he playfully swats at niki’s shoulder. 

“i think you should confess, hyung.” jungwon says, setting his phone aside. “you guys would be cute together.” 

sunghoon turns away, looking down at the ground. he lets their reassurances calm his nerves, thinking back on the interactions he’s had with you. all of the little things he brushed off as your friendly personality or shared experiences. with a final sigh, he nods. “alright. they asked for help with their report. i’ll ask them then.” 

heeseung pats his shoulder again. “that’s my boy.” 

sunghoon rolls his eyes, silently grateful for the push into finally telling you about how he feels. 

sunghoon is standing on the court across from beomgyu with a ball in his hand again sooner than he thinks. he can see you snapping photos in the corner of his eye. the rest of the game hinges on this shot. the scoreboard on the wall shows a large white timer, slowly counting down. only 30 seconds left. 

he takes a deep breath, willing his nerves to calm down. everything feels like it’s going too fast and too slow at the same time. suddenly all of the eyes on him are no longer friends and classmates. they don’t feel comforting and excited. they simply increase the pressure he feels all around him - like he’s drowning. like the air is slowly being stolen from his lungs. 

“hoon!” your sweet voice breaks him out of his anxiety induced trance. he looks at you fully this time, eyes meeting yours. you raise your fist once again to cheer him on. “you can do it!” 

sunghoon smiles, taking a deep breath. finally, he jumps, forcing the ball through the air towards the hoop. it spins as it bounces against the backboard before falling down through the net in a single fluid motion. 

the audience cheers slowly come back to reality. he waits for the referee to blow his whistle, the timer letting out a loud ring to announce the end of the game. this time he doesn’t wait for his friends to swarm him or to congratulate the other team. he acts purely on instinct, running over to you and wrapping his arms around you in a tight hug. you laugh, clinging onto his shoulders as he spins you around. he pulls back, looking down into your eyes. “i’m so in love with you.” 

your smile grows even larger before the words register to him. before he can react himself you pull him down, so your foreheads touch. “can i kiss you?” 

still somewhat in a trance, sunghoon nods. euphoria bursts through him when you finally lean up to press your lips against his in a sweet kiss. he brings a hand up to cup your cheek, coaxing you even closer and deepening it. you smile against his lips, pressing a final peck against them before pulling away. 

you’re both panting by the end of it, smiling at each other. “can i call you mine?” sunghoon finally asks. 

“i always have been.” unable to hide his excitement any longer, your - now boyfriend - pulls you into yet another kiss.